Wednesday, May 30, 2012

I Seriously Can't Keep My Mind Out of the Gutter

Massive Brass Pipe or Fountain Nozzle...You decide.
Nom Nom Nom

If I could have found a picture of a nipple, I totally would have posted it. Hmm. Maybe I'll ask my pipe guy to send me one. Of course, thats the kind of email request that could cause a big misunderstanding.
"Very nice but I meant a BRASS nipple, not YOUR nipple..."

Is it lunch time yet??!

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Crazy Town-Not the Same as Funky Town



I’ve seen some crazy things in the past few days and I had to blog about them before I forgot.



1. I smiled at a guy in traffic a few days ago-an older man in a white excursion (or something similar-it was big, white and had lots of windows) and he gave me the thumbs up sign. Okay, that was weird, but then he makes a big deal about getting in front of me, and then turns off into the Albertsons parking lot and waves me to follow him. Weirder. And no, I didn’t follow him in. I kept on driving cause he couldn’t want anything good, acting that way and quite frankly, even though I carry a weapon, it’s my sincerest hope that I never have to use it. I smile at a lot of people on the way home-men and women. This was the first time someone actually took it as an invitation.
2. I saw a wreck happen right behind me. I mean, I literally watched it unfold in my review mirror. It was on the way home last night and I was in the middle lane on the freeway. The line of cars to my right started hitting their breaks and as I went by, one of the trucks in that lane made an awful screeching sound. I got past him, but then he swerved right out into my lane and hit the car behind me. That car flipped and landed on its roof in the center median. The. Car. Right. Fucking. Behind. Me. It could have been me, it was that close. If I was still a smoker, I probably would have lit up two right then. I didn’t stop because everyone behind me was stopping and there was nothing I could do. But now that I think about it, I do have a first aid kit in my jeep. Maybe I could have done something. Aw. Crap. I hope those people are ok.

3. I was sitting at Scronic, enjoying my lunch and my book, when I heard a loud crashing noise behind me. A roofing company truck had ignored the height clearance sign and the ladder in the back of his truck took it out. (See my facebook page for a pic) The driver very nonchalantly got out and removed the sign completely and propped it up gently next to the building. I couldn’t help but laugh at that one. Luckily, all he took out was the sign. He didn’t do any damage to the awning on the building when he pulled up to the window, which just goes to show those clearance signs are just there to scare you..